Enough of Not Enough 匱乏中的足夠
Quieting our inner critic during the holiday time
The holiday season from Thanksgiving through Christmas and Chinese New Year has gotten underway and with it comes a whole slew of extra celebrations, feasts, activities and obligations. As the schedule gets fuller and interactions with others more frequent, time starts blurring and I have to catch myself as I get into a familiar cycle of “too much/ not enough” in my head.
I have too many things to do. I don’t have enough time.
I work too much. I didn’t talk to my loved ones enough.
I ate too much. I didn’t exercise enough.
I felt too stressed and stayed up too late. I didn’t get enough sleep.
I wasted too much time or was distracted too much. I’m not prepared enough.
I teach too much. I don’t learn enough.
I feel or think too much . I don’t have enough.
I’m not enough.
There’s nothing particularly remarkable about these thoughts. Most people can relate to at least some from the list, or add their own, because judging ourselves is pretty deeply ingrained in so many of us. Especially when we are trying to focus on self-improvement in our health, lifestyles, work and relationships, our inner critic can be harshest. Especially when we gather with others to celebrate holidays or do a year-end review, we compare and judge ourselves first, almost as a way to protect ourselves from the opinions of others.
Just a few days of getting stuck in the too much/ not enough loop can drain me. Setting impossibly high standards for ourselves and attaching our worth to them, just means that we’ll never be enough. A lot of what we do will be based on fear and obligation rather than come from love and joy.
This holiday season I need to tell myself I’m enough. Not because of what I do or don’t do, have or don’t have. Simply just because I’m me--flaws, funny quirks, good attributes and all. I can work on owning the choices I make with my time, choose to improve in areas I can, and accept myself for who I am right now.
I’m enough. And in case you need to hear it right now, you are enough, too.
Wishing you a peaceful and self-love filled start to your holiday season!
Keep moving! xx, Katie
( Anna Liang 譯 )